Stop Losing weight then putting it back on. Here is how.
Why do people gain and lose weight? Why do they get lean, and then gain body fat? Why is it that most do not manage to keep it off? There is a multitude of factors but I want to address one in this blog. It’s often because you took yourself off your own priority list. Yes, you did. It’s a common error – a single mistake that can literally determine whether you succeed or fail. I’ve done it. You may have done it. Almost everyone has done it at least at one time or another in their lives. But if you continuously de-prioritise yourself, you have no chance of losing weight and keeping it off. This is exactly what Oprah said when asked my she has re-gained her weight so many times.
The Big Fat Loss Mistake
You took yourself off your own priority list.
You have to put yourself first for weight loss success
When you set your life’s priorities and put your life values in order, your health MUST be number one on the list. Everything else in your life depends on you being in good health and good physical condition. Everything you are so busy about doesn’t matter if you’re sick or dead.
Nevertheless, many people think “oh Ingrid your single with no kids you don’t understand” when I suggest that their own health and well-being has to come above their families. They think the notion is absurd. They think it’s selfish. Actually, yes, it is selfish and that’s exactly how it should be.
Your intentions may be noble. But how do you take care of your family without your own health? There’s a phenomenon called the “rock bottom” experience. I’ve read about it in the psychology and behaviour research journals and I’ve seen it with my own eyes in the real world over and over again. Unfortunately, it’s when many people come to me for help. Truth be told, I hit my own rock bottom in 2015 when I underwent my massive own personal transformation (again) except this time I have kept it off. Why? Because I remain number 1 on my priority list. Not family. Not business. Me.
Fat Loss and Weight Loss Motivators
People will do almost anything to end pain or cure a disease, but they usually won’t lift a finger to prevent it. Only when debilitating pain or illness strikes them down or threatens them – when they hit “rock bottom” – does changing their ways even appear on their radar. For them, getting out of pain is the negative motivation that finally triggers a change.
Of all diseases or “pains”, the most alarming thing about excess body fat is that it creeps. Each additional kilogram is “no big deal” at first, so it’s easy to keep postponing action until it’s too late and you have a health crisis or hit some kind of emotional rock bottom.
That’s why you must put yourself first.
Putting yourself first when you have other responsibilities does seem selfish, and in a manner of speaking, it really is. But it’s “appropriately selfish.”
Many people say they could never do it because tending to their business or career is at the top of their list. Or, they’re more than willing to be care-takers and sacrifice their priorities for the people they love. Again, that’s admirable. But what happens when a father’s son says “dad, can you drop me off two blocks from school?” because he is embarrassed about “how fat” his dad is. This lead one of my clients to breakdown in his fitness consultation.
What happens when a mum gets so big that she can’t fit in a plane seat next to her daughter? If the family breadwinner is laid off because he or she is sick or physically incapable of doing the job, your in trouble. If you drop dead of a heart attack in your 40’s or 50’s? What will your family do then?
If it could have been prevented, isn’t that the ultimate in selfishness?
Isn’t it true that these things really happen every day?
People who take the leap of faith and put their health first are transforming their lives AND the lives of others
I think it’s fantastic that more and more people are beginning to understand that you don’t have hit bottom to change – all you need is a powerful reason to change NOW.
In a positive twist of irony, the reason to change may be the very thing that was previously being used as an excuse. The biggest reason many people didn’t put themselves first in the past is “taking care of family”, but they are now realising that family is THE very reason to be “appropriately selfish.”
Let’s talk safety talks on planes. I know most of us tune out, but what’s the first thing they say? They direct the mums that have babies to put the oxygen mask on themselves first. “Look after yourself first” is the message. There is a lesson.
Why Fat Loss Can Be Challenging?
There are fires burning all around you. I know. Each of us may have different kinds of fires, but we all have them. For some people, kids are screaming, other kids need a ride to school. Spouses need attention. Bills must be paid. You’re late on your tax return. The car needs a service. Your boss needs you at work now. There are phone calls to return. Errands to Run. Your inbox is crammed full and there is no time for everything. COVID. Life-change.
The currency of life at the moment is “busy”. The pace is NOT going to get slower. It’s going to accelerate. That’s why this message is so timely and important right now.
What Can You Do to Lose Weight Once and For All?
Here is precisely what you should do: It’s what I did:
Yes, in the middle of all the chaos! With fires burning all around you! Just STOP! Take a deep breath. Centre yourself. Now shift focus to what’s most important in life.
Tell yourself. “None of this stuff that’s stressing me out matters – not one bit of it – if I’m sick, immobilised or dead. I come first. I’m number one. I can only take care of my family and my business, my pets and my friends if I’ve taken care of myself first.
Now calmly and quietly say to yourself, “This is MY TIME. This is ME TIME!” Then go take care of yourself. Go train, guilt free. Go take a stress relief break. Go calmly into the kitchen to eat or prep your meals for the whole day, organised in Tupperware, if necessary, in anticipation of the hectic, fast paced day ahead.
How Being Proactive in Fat Loss Makes You Feel Amazing
Having taken action to take care of yourself, you will be infused and invigorated with a GOOD feeling. You will feel confident, because taking action for self-improvement builds confidence. Miracle of miracles, you may find that any fires still burning can still be extinguished and you actually put out the flames more confidently – and calmly – than before. Some of those fires will even have burned themselves out.
If you can’t take immediate action, then do some immediate planning.
Values are important to fat loss
In a quiet and centred mental space, pull out your calendar, personal organiser or a blank sheet of paper and start planning, scheduling, goal setting and prioritsing. As long as you don’t get stuck in the “always planning, never acting” mode, it’s remarkable how focused and calm this will make you feel. Most important, you’ll get clarity on what is the next most important action to take.
And be sure to make priority lists, instead of “to do lists.” That may be just semantics, but “to do” lists are usually filled up with stuff that’s not that important. Priorities are the things that are most important to you.
Personal life values are important. They are precious. They include things like your family, humanitarian endeavours and even your spiritual beliefs. I would never tell any person what all their values should be. That’s their business. But I will tell you what order your values should be in – your health goes first. Above all the others.
Is that selfish? Yes… But it’s appropriately selfish. And being appropriately selfish is one of the keys to great heath, happiness and success – for you and all those you care about.